"Thanksliving": More than thanksgiving
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
(1 Thessalonians 5:18 ESV)
This is a familiar verse that I have heard countless times since I was a young Christian.
“Give thanks…”.
It is easy to be thankful when life is going well. When work is fulfilling, our loved ones are healthy, and everything seems to fall into place.
But what happens when things take an unexpected turn? When we receive a difficult medical diagnosis? When we lose a good and secure job? When our loved ones are suddenly taken away from us?
Can we still give thanks then? Can we really thank God when our hearts are hurting?
I found myself struggling with these questions last year.
I was just a year into my new job, when my mother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer. It came as a shock to me. She was a gentle lady and took care of me like her daughter. I felt that I can share anything with her without judgement. It was a challenging period for us, as we tried to manage the side effects of the treatments, and handled her medical appointment schedules.
Within the year, she was hospitalised and admitted to intensive care. Eventually, she passed away at the hospital. This added to the mental and emotional load that I was already carrying. Eventually, I made the difficult decision to leave my job so that I could spend more time caring for my family—and also caring for myself.
Within a short span of three months, my biological mother was also hospitalised due to a medical condition and admitted to intensive care. While it was a struggle for her, she eventually was discharged back home for palliative care, before passing away at home.
There were times I wondered:
God, why is this happening?
I am not prepared to face any of this...
What am I going to do...?
I feel lonely and helpless.
And in those moments, telling myself to “be thankful” was difficult. Giving thanks felt impossible.
But 1 Thessalonians 5:18 was a reminder for me. Paul says to give thanks in everything. He did not say to give thanks for everything.
There is a difference.
I do not have to pretend that disappointment does not hurt or that grief is not real. But even in the middle of those circumstances, I can look for God. I can give thanks in the circumstance.
That became an anchor for me.
And when life gets difficult, it was so important to learn to slow down. When we feel overwhelmed, our instinct is often to rush through it or simply survive it.
But slowing down helps me to notice people, moments and opportunities that I might otherwise miss. It also helps me to tune in to what God might be saying or showing me.
During those long hospital days, there were moments when I felt so tired and completely drained without a good night sleep, and having to be constantly on the alert.
I struggled to attend Quiet Hour because of the tiredness and anxiety. The heart is willing, but the flesh is weak. But when I did manage to go, I found myself thankful for the familiar faces. For being able to sit with others. For reading God's Word together. For having a safe place to breathe.
His Word became an encouragement and an anchor in a season when there were so many uncertainties. And the presence of dear sisters reminded me that sometimes God's love becomes tangible through the people He places around us.
I began to notice other little things too. Moments that drew our family closer. Friends who came to visit us in the hospital. Friends who brought food. Someone reminding me to rest.
I remembered feeling drained and tired after a long night of caregiving at home and just then, a friend called to ask if she could send some food for us. I remember how the tea and cakes made us so happy and glad that we forgot our tiredness momentarily.
These things can seem so small. But they are little reminders of God's grace. Little expressions of His love. Little gifts that help keep us going.
I have discovered that it is often in the waiting that His presence becomes even more real.
In recent months, I have also been thankful for God's providence as I settled into a new part-time job. It has given me opportunities to meet people, have meaningful conversations and hear stories I would otherwise never have heard.
Sometimes I get the opportunity to pray with someone about something they are carrying. And sometimes I find myself thinking:
God, maybe this is part of what You are doing.
I am learning that “Thanksliving” is more than thanksgiving. It is not simply a moment when I stop and say, “Thank You, God.” It is a way of living.
It is learning to slow down enough to notice. To savour the blessings that are already around me. And then to serve by sharing what I have received with others.
Even when life is not going according to plan. Even when I am still waiting. Even when I am still grieving. Even when some prayers remain unanswered.
There will be something—even something small—that I can give thanks for each day.
Maybe someone. Maybe a moment. Maybe a provision. Maybe a little bit of strength. Maybe simply the fact that I made it through another day.
I have peace not because life is easy. I have peace because I know He is with me.
For that, I am thankful. Because I know I do not have to do life alone. I can trust Him, even when I do not understand His plans.
Perhaps that is what Thanksliving is really about. Not pretending that everything is okay. But learning to recognise God's gift and presence in the midst of it all. And trusting in His love for me.
May we learn to see the little gifts of grace scattered throughout our ordinary days.
And may our gratitude become more than something we say. May it become the way we live—whether life feels full or empty, joyful or painful, certain or uncertain.
Lynn Eer is currently working part-time and a mother to 2 young men (20 &23). Lynn has been in the ToReally.Live core team since 2025.
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